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Oh No They Didn't! -

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    Looks like the prescription didn’t work for Jillian Michaels: The TV superstar trainer is leaving the daytime syndicated hit show “The Doctors” after a half season.

    According to insiders who spoke to the New York Post, Jillian “wasn’t a good fit” since she was the only co-host among the other four—Travis Stork, Lisa Masterson, James Sears, and Drew Ordon—who wasn’t a physician. (Sounds like a recipe for massive ego clashing if you ask us.)

    “Jillian has contributed greatly to our show this season, and we value her talent and insight as she has inspired countless people to improve their lives,” the show said in a statement. “Although it wasn’t the fit we both hoped for…Jillian will always be a part of ‘The Doctors’ family.”

    Jillian issued her own public farewell, albeit a more succinct one: “I have enjoyed my time on the show and the opportunity it provided me in my mission to help others improve their lives.”


    too hot for daytime tv imo

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    An old-man friend (and apparently some sort of fuckbuddy) of Jenelle Evans from Teen Mom 2 has shared some interesting photos with the world.

    sexting, booze, Jenelle's phone number, and more girl on girl action after the cut.

    aaaaaaand here's some texts that she sent to this guy:

    there's more on his twitter, if you can stomach it.

    Sooooooooooo who wants to take bets on when she'll get Jace back?

    Also check out this video of Jenelle being drunk and annoying while rolling around with some girls on a bed. She also tells the world that she has a smoothly shaven vagina. Great! Can't embed so CLICK HERE

    Source, 1,2

    Mods, sorry, this is me resubmitting. I realized in my first attempt that the first pic was too large according to the community rules. This should be the right size now.

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    NEW YORK — Teen star Miranda Cosgrove says she doesn’t usually get nervous about taping episodes of her Nickelodeon comedy, “iCarly,” but that changed when first lady Michelle Obama taped an appearance on the show.

    “I’ve been doing the show for a long time and I usually don’t get nervous, but having the first lady on the set, I was really nervous,” laughed Cosgrove, 18, in an interview Wednesday.

    Nickelodeon and the White House want to show support for U.S. military families with a cameo by the first lady on the show.

    On “iCarly,” Cosgrove plays Carly Shay, the daughter of an Air Force colonel who is serving overseas.

    In an episode titled, “iMeet the First Lady,” Carly gets upset when her father’s return from active duty is canceled because he is deployed again. Her friends decide to surprise her with a live feed to her father during an iCarly webcast. After Mrs. Obama sees the webcast, she praises Carly for being such a supportive daughter to a father who is serving his country.

    Cosgrove said that despite being nervous about meeting Mrs. Obama, she found her quite approachable, calling the first lady a “nice, pretty normal person” who even danced with the cast during a regular segment called “Random Dancing.”

    “It was probably the most fun thing we did. We all just got to let loose and have a good time,” Cosgrove said.

    To promote the show, cast members will appear at four screening events for military families. The screenings will be held in Miramar, Calif., on Jan. 9; Groton, Conn., on Jan. 11; Fort Dix, N.J., on Jan. 12; and Alexandria, Va., on Jan. 13.

    Cosgrove said the goal is to “let (military) kids know how important their parents are.”

    The episode of “iCarly” featuring the first lady will air Jan. 16 on Nickelodeon at 7:30 p.m. EST.


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  • 01/05/12--16:17: Article 13

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  • 01/05/12--16:17: Article 12

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    Episode description since I can't find a clip anywhere:
    When Tessa is asked to show new guy Josh Sherman (Dan Byrd) around school, she becomes convinced that he’s gay, when in fact he’s an undercover narcotics officer. Lisa becomes deeply infatuated with Josh, and Tessa inadvertly convinces Mr. Wolfe to make special announcement to the student body. Meanwhile George re-evaluates his relationship with Dallas, on ‘Suburgatory,’ WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 11 (8:30-9:00 p.m., ET). WATCH IT, BITCHES.

    Jane Levy was dubbed a Hollywood Darling by 'The Hollywood Reporter' but I don't wanna subscribe to get the article, that shit's expensive so here's the picture ;)

    Interview with Jane, from
    The DMV is a magical place where dreams are either made or crushed for 16-year-olds who want nothing more than a little plastic card that says they can drive. On tonight’s episode of ABC's Suburgatory, Tessa (Jane Levy) satisfies this dream, only to have to deal with the needs of Dalia Royce, who makes her an offer she can’t refuse. We grabbed a few minutes with Levy to discuss the clash that forms between Tessa and Dalia on the show and George’s life as a “playa.” We also got a chance to talk about her real driving test when she was 16 and a surprising automatic fail the first time, and how her dream of filming with Johnny Knoxville is still unfulfilled.

    So on tonight’s episode, you get your license. Tell us more.
    I get hired by Dalia Royce to be her driver. At first, I say, “No way I want to spend more time with you,” but Dalia is willing to fork over a lot of cash so Tessa is into it. Her first assignment is to circle a boy’s house (Scott) that Dalia’s obsessed with. It turns out that this guys likes Tessa a lot more than he likes Dalia, and that starts the rivalry between the two.
    Is there a dilemma for Tessa, or does she just go for it with Scott?
    Well, Tessa is extremely attracted to this guy and at first she gets caught up in it a little. Then she decides to be a big person and not chase Scott ... She tries to approach Dalia as an adult, but of course Dalia is incapable of understanding anything or having an adult conversation … She is not used to not getting what she wants and when she doesn’t, it is the worst thing ... so Tessa says, “Screw it, I’m going to do whatever I want,” and it will carry into the next episodes how upset Dalia is. She will do anything to get back at Tessa. It sparks this war.
    Does this episode bring back memories of you getting your license?
    Totally! I actually failed my first license test. I got an automatic fail. I guess I had been doing well but she had to pull the emergency break so obviously there was a problem. I remember them handing me my fail paper and me just bursting into tears. This poor instructor, she ran out of the car once I started crying, I scared her … But two weeks later, I passed.
    What can we expect coming for the rest of the season?
    A lot of love interests for George. George is sort of a "playa." You will see a lot of women circling him, and a war between Tessa and Dalia. The friendship between Lisa and Tessa just gets deeper, and I really love their relationship. You are also going to see more Dallas and Tessa time; there is going to be more bonding there.
    You mentioned love interests for George, anyone you think your character would like to see him with?
    That’s a good question … I think Tessa is trying. You see at the end of the Christmas episode, she says, “I messed up.” She has a little moment with Lisa, where she realizes she is being way too possessive of her dad. But with that said, I think it is still innate in her to not like it … she tries to embrace things and you’ll see her become more vulnerable.
    Any similarities between you and your character? Any differences?
    I think I was pretty different at 16 than Tessa. I think she is much more thoughtful, she is a really thoughtful 16-year-old girl. I think what’s so cool about her is that yeah, she is snarky and makes fun of stuff, but she is usually right and funny. Underneath it, I think she is a good-hearted person … I wish I was more like Tessa as a 16-year-old.
    Apart from the show, you are in a 2012 movie Fun Size with with Victoria Justice and Chelsea Handler, what is that about?
    It is going to come out this Halloween ... It’s like a teen, Halloween comedy. I play a character that is the antithesis of Tessa … Johnny Knoxville is also in it and I didn’t have any scenes with him, such a bummer! I was there for like eight weeks and the one week he was there was like my one week off. Everyone was like, “He’s the coolest guy ever!” and I missed it. is my source I can't even with rich text, right now.
    My internet is being such a pain rn and I'm done fighting it, if the format is annoying sorryyy :(

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    Tyke beauty pageant series “Toddlers & Tiaras” provided some of the most horrifying moments on reality TV in 2011, and it looks like 2012 will have more of the same. This week, the show that (almost) defies parody introduces us to six-year-old Alana from Georgia… and her drinking problem.

    It should be noted that Alana seems rather spirited in the first place (“A dollar makes me holler, honey boo-boo!”), but June, her extreme couponer mom, has a trick up her sleeve for pageants – “special juice.”

    Oh, but don’t worry! According to June, everyone juices!

    “Everybody has their different concoctions… ‘special juice’ is just to help [Alana] energize,” explains June.

    Ohhh-kay. We’re not sure exactly what’s in the “concoction,” but since Pixy Stix (known as “pageant crack”) “don’t do anything for her” anymore, we’re guessing Alana’s supercharged drink is pretty potent.


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    Joel Edgerton locks Bin Laden pic

    Warrior thesp is officially in Bigelow/Boal project

    By Justin KROLL

    Joel Edgerton's name has long been linked to the untitled Osama Bin Laden pic from Kathryn Bigelow and Mark Boal, and now the Warrior thesp has officially signed on to star.

    Reports had Edgerton in the project as early as May, but insiders said at the time that he was merely the unofficial top choice, as the script was unfinished. By the time a script was done and casting began in October, it looked like Edgerton's schedule would clash with shooting; he'd been mulling an offer to star in the 300 prequel. But Edgerton passed on the Warner Bros. project, freeing him up to join the Bin Laden pic cast that already includes Jason Clarke.

    Sony is distributing with Bigelow attached to direct from Boal's script. Megan Ellison's Annapurna Pictures will finance.

    Story revolves around the Navy Seal team that tracked and eventually killed Osama Bin Laden. Boal and Bigelow, whose Hurt Locker collaboration was an Oscar best pic winner, will produce along with Ellison, Greg Shapiro and Ted Schipper.

    The pic is expected to go into production next month and will bow on Dec. 19, 2012.

    A number of open roles are still open, including a female reporter embedded with the Seal 6 team.

    Rooney Mara had been eyed, though her The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo promotion schedule prevented it.

    Edgerton's name has become a very popular among Hollywood execs for several high profile pics in the last year. Prior to Lionsgate's Warrior, he was being looked at for starring roles in Universal's The Bourne Legacy and Snow White and the Huntsman before joining Warner Bros.' The Great Gatsby.

    He is repped by CAA and Shanahan Management.

    Source: Variety

    Comment: Not sure about a film on this subject right now tbh...

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    (CBS) It looks as if Marc Anthony has moved on following his split from Jennifer Lopez.

    The singer apparently has a new lady in his life - 24-year-old Venezuelan model Shannon De Lima - and has declared his affection for her on Twitter.

    "A mi @Shadelima mi estatua de libertad. Besos bebe," Anthony tweeted on Wednesday, which translates to, "To @Shadelima, my statue of liberty. Kisses baby."

    On his Facebook page, the 43-year-old is seen in a photo kissing a woman that reports have identified as De Lima. The image is captioned, "Gracias!"

    Anthony's son Chase Muniz (whom he adopted while dating Debbie Rosado) reportedly gave the relationship his stamp of approval. Reports say he tweeted, "To all my followers and everybody on twitter follow 2012 best couple and for many more years to come @MarcAnthony and @Shadelima !!!!!" That message no longer appears on his Twitter account.

    "My dad is happy im happy. Love you dad!!!!!!!!!" Muniz also wrote on Twitter.

    Anthony and Lopez ended their seven-year marriage last summer. They are parents to twins Max and Emme, who will turn 4 in February.

    The "American Idol" judge has also moved on since the divorce - she's been dating 24-year-old dancer Casper Smart since November.


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    More Parks and Recreation Characters As Cartoons from Vulture

    Your 12-Step Plan for Survivin' the Apocalypse

    If you believe the Mayans, 2012 marks the End of Days. But post-apocalyptic life ain't so bad if you do it right. With scotch. And weed. And lots of animal abuse. Parks and Recreation's Nick Offerman and Chris Pratt show us how to persevere

    1 Fill the tub with water. For this tub, as well as the contents of your hot-water heater, will be your drinking supply. Fill the sinks with scotch—and cover, obviously.

    2 If there's any looting to be done, focus on marijuana dispensaries. If you don't live in California, that's too bad. We have marijuana dispensaries.

    3 Assemble a posse of hooligan underlings, choosing a mix of muscular physiques and corpulent ones. Harvest fat from the chubbies and cook the muscular folks in it. When the fatties run out of cellulite to harvest, they are now prime, lean cooking specimens. Obviously you'll need to be fattening up new "team members" as you go, perpetuating the savory cycle.

    4 Find gas. Don't try siphoning it, though. It is very difficult to do on these new cars, and you get a crazy headache. An ounce of precaution is worth a pound of succulent human flesh post-Apocalypse.

    5 Find electricity. Toyota FJ Cruisers offer a convenient 115-volt plug-in. You have gas? You have electricity. Also, we really like Toyota FJ Cruisers. Can we have one for mentioning it in this article? Perhaps with an off-road TRD package and Warn winch bumper?

    6 Make sure your garage is filled with canned foods that don't taste good when you're stoned. Trust us, you don't want to end up eating forty cases of chili mac just 'cause it felt amazing in your mouth. We've been there. It gets expensive.

    7 Batteries. Get some.

    8 Find a large grizzly bear. Punch it in the face. It's cool; no more PETA. If you enjoy it like we do, keep it up. Punch every bear you can find. Punch a cougar. Good times are hard to come by in the Apocalypse. If you accidentally kill the bear, don't let that good meat and coat go to waste. Cubs make cool post-apocalyptic pets.

    9 Find a suitable stream and construct a waterwheel. This will power your woodworking shop. Hone your woodworking skills until you and your progeny can produce Hula-hoops. When civilization returns, they will sell like hotcakes, and your fortune will be secured.

    10 Just in case, starting immediately, carry a small go-pack at all times, containing fishing line, hooks, waterproof matches, a compass, a wire saw, and water-purification tablets. Or just get a Rambo knife. They look real badass.

    11 Carry a lucky relic, like a watch or something, to pass on to your offspring right before you die: "Protect this watch. I kept it in my ass for two years in Nam." (Even if it's not true, this is what you should say.)

    12 Set out for the Massachusetts area with your team of marauders, living off human flesh and the occasional bear feast. Make your way to Fenway Park and play ball all day long. Nobody will stop you; it'll be totally awesome! Paint a huge cock and balls on the Green Monster! It'll be hilarious! Bring a few goats to keep the outfield trimmed and to attract bears for pleasure punching.

    The Ben Schwartz Section
    Screening Of Showtime's "Hou$e Of Lie$"

    Q+A: 'Parks and Rec' joker Ben Schwartz serious on 'House of Lies'

    Fans of NBC's "Parks and Recreation" know Ben Schwartz as wildly deluded, eccentrically coiffed Jean-Ralphio Saperstein -- a character who the actor says lives every moment like he's at Disney World. But we're about to see a brand new, considerably less goofy side of Schwartz on Showtime's "House of Lies."

    The series, which premieres Sunday and costars Don Cheadle and Kristen Bell, follows a team of four management consultants who will do whatever it takes to close a deal, satisfy a client or boost their own career prospects. Although no one is a saint in this dark comedy, Schwartz's character, the cocky and calculating Clyde Oberholt, may be the most ruthless of all.

    We spoke to the actor, comedian and writer during a break from his work on yet another TV project -- voicing the title character in the forthcoming Disney XD animated series "Randy Cunningham: Ninth Grade Ninja" -- about his role on "House of Lies" and how it compares to his gig on "Parks and Rec."

    What kind of guy is your "House of Lies" character, Clyde Oberholt?

    He's the arrogant management consultant, always hitting on women. But at the same time, his eye is always on escalating where he is in the company. What everybody cares about is making that money, getting the deal, but Clyde eyes [his boss, Cheadle's] Marty Kaan, thinking, "I'm gonna get there. I'm gonna take over for him. I'm gonna find a way to be where he is." He always has that in the back of his head. Marty is best friends with me, but I'm not necessarily best friends with Marty.

    "Parks and Recreation" is known for featuring some of the most likable characters on TV. On "House of Lies," the consultants and their profession are more morally ambiguous. How did you approach playing a darker character?

    When I'm playing Jean-Ralphio, I'm thinking, "How would a guy who thinks he's nailing it say something? A guy who isn't even aware of how stupid the words he's saying would sound." But Clyde says things with intent. He's not going to waste time.

    Showtime is known for these flawed characters, and the idea of seeing the layers. Because of the way "House of Lies" is written, you get to see why [Clyde] would make a certain move or why he would act a certain way. Slowly, as the series goes, you see how the flawed characters either redeem themselves or keep crashing into oblivion. You watch all of us choose our paths and take our blows. It's a pretty exciting series arc.

    Actors on "Parks and Rec" are mostly comedians with improv backgrounds. What was it like working with Cheadle and Bell, who are best known for their dramatic roles?

    "House of Lies" also stars Josh Lawson, who is an improviser from Australia. He and I clicked so hard. And Don Cheadle is so intensely funny in real life that he is able to catch on to any little bit you do. If we improvise, he is as quick as all of us. The amazing thing about him is that he can be hilarious, and then in the next sentence, he can make you cry. Kristen is hilarious -- if you saw "Forgetting Sarah Marshall," she was great in it. In between takes, we would all just play with each other. Our rapport has become so fun, and we've [developed] a great shorthand. I've been very fortunate. The casts on "House of Lies" and "Parks and Rec" are amazing.

    Management consulting is a strange and mysterious field. How did you educate yourself about it to prepare for the role?

    I lucked out. The show was based on a book by Martin Kihn. He came in one day, and we talked, and it was amazing. It was hilarious to find out that the hardest question for [management consultants] to answer is what they do. It's hard for them to explain because half of it is bull. They con their way into getting the job done. So when I asked [Kihn], "How do you explain it?," he said, "We have a word-for-word answer, but your job is whatever it takes to get the job done." Almost like a chameleon, you change into whatever [your client] needs.

    The characters on "House of Lies" are working with big-business leaders, and they're very aware that some of their clients are ethically bankrupt. How did the economic crisis and the rise of the 99% movement affect the show?

    Although we had wrapped before Occupy Wall Street and Occupy LA, you could predict that, in the future, these types of things were going to happen. Our showrunner, Matthew Carnahan, was very aware of it. It's definitely in the DNA of what our show is -- which I think is exciting. When we're going through something as a country, to have some sort of voice for it on television is pretty cool. If we got a second season, I cannot imagine the fun we could have with all the Occupy stuff.

    Interview: Ben Schwartz Talks "House of Lies," Jean-Ralphio's Ever-Elevating Hair & His Rejection-Filled Climb in Comedy

    Comedian Ben Schwartz doesn't just look like he's having fun, he truly is having the time of his life. Maybe that's why his bombastically-coiffed alter-ego, Park and Recreation's Jean-Ralphio Saperstein has developed a rabid-fan base that has taken to turning his every eccentric move into a GIF, a montage, or some other viral-ready form, despite the fact that he has only been in nine episodes. Maybe it can be attributed to the finely-tuned circus act he and Aziz Ansari have cultivated, his unmatched ability to end his every turn of phrase in rhyme, or his wonderfully smarmy attempts to lure in the ladies.

    But more than likely, it's Schwartz's infectious energy that makes his expressive mug memorable in a sea of sober-faced talent. We spoke to the actor-writer about his new dark comedy on Showtime, House of Lies (which premieres Sunday, January 8th at 10 p.m. ET), in which he stars alongside Don Cheadle, Kristen Bell, and Josh Lawson as a contrived consultant who unhesitatingly uses humans as stepping stones in his climb to the top, and it only served to contrast just how different the comedian's own rise was. After speaking with Schwartz about his circuitous climb to the top, and how he managed to make his way up entertainment's rejection-mined ladder with enthusiasm and humility in tact, we were left humbled and enthused ourselves. Now if we could only duplicate that 'do...

    Most comedians are really narrow in their scope, but you're all over the place—in a good way.
    What a terrible way to start an interview! Before you said "in a good way." You're kind of a fucking mess. [Laughs.]

    [Laughs.] No, like a renaissance type of man! Which of your many roles is the most satisfying for you—writing, improv, or acting?
    Oh, OK, I'm kind of excited now. I feel like you're not going to ask the same questions everyone else has. For me, my favorite thing in the world to do is improvising, doing stuff for UCB [Upright Citizens Brigade] on stage. I've been doing it for 10 years and it's the way I started. We don't get paid, but it's just amazing. But acting, like Parks And Recreation and House Of Lies and all the comedy stuff I've been doing, is really what I get the most joy out of.

    Writing is fun as well, it's just intensely lonely when you're by yourself writing all day. The best feeling in the world is handing in a script that you wrote with your name on it. You feel good about it, but to write is such a process, and frustrating and all that stuff. I love performing with people. When I'm on Parks doing scenes with Aziz or Amy and acting with Don Cheadle it's really a joy. Improvising is something I've been doing my whole life. It's like play time.

    As a comedian whose roots run really deep in UCB, what can you say about the worth of improv in general for would-be comics out there?
    Improv is such a great tool for almost everything. It teaches you the basics, saying yes to something and adding to it. It teaches you what you're good at comedically, and teaches you how to get better at it and to find your voice and explore from there. It kind of helps everything. My writing is based on improv. I can do it with scenes when I'm kind of improving the whole scene dialogue-wise, and if you're allowed to improvise in audtions you can kind of add a little bit to the script and make the character more your own and impress people.

    You're particularly adept at embodying Jean-Ralphio's schemin', womanizing shtick. Does that persona come naturally to you?
    Schemin', you said? You didn't even put a a g on the end of it!

    Yep. Schemin' and creepin' on the ladies. No g's.
    [Laughs.] For me, my game is, I don't really have any game. My game in real life is being nice and getting shut down hard. For me, Jean-Ralphio is embodying a character, and me being like, "He's such a douche bag." But he's a sweetheart. He doesn't know he's being a douche. He just really wants to have sex with women. It's so fun for me to figure out, "OK, in this situation, what's the skeeziest way to try to pick up this girl? Oh, I'm going to go over and smell her hair before I even say a word to her." In my real life, I don't use it at all, but it's so fun to do it on camera.

    You've never attempted to take any of those moves off-screen?
    No! I think a human being would get slapped for that. I don't think I'd want to go out with a girl who'd want to go out with Jean-Ralphio. I don't think I'd want to date a woman who, when I go up to her and start dancing like a crazy person and licking her neck would be like, "Oh, this is the person I've been looking for!"

    Is having Aziz as your skeezy partner in crime helpful in terms of your comedic timing?
    So much. The whole idea behind how they built the character is that I'm his best friend, so I know everything about him and we kind of act the same. And it's kind of hilarious, because in any other situation he's the one who is kinda weird and eccentric and being like, "Uh oh, uh oh!" And when I come in, I'm an exaggerated version of that, so somehow he'll become the straight man because I'm being so crazy.

    It's fun for both of us because it's the first time where someone is as like-minded as him in his endeavors, like trying to pick up women and starting Snake Juice and our own company. It's extremely helpful when someone comes out with an idea for you to be like-minded in that. So if someone loves puppies, it's really fun for me to come out on stage and really love puppies as well. So for both of us to enjoy being douches and picking up women, it becomes so much fun.

    It's fun to watch you two in action together.
    [Last season] was so good. I only get to read the scripts that I'm in and those are amazing. I think the last episode may be my favorite Jean-Ralphio episode so far.

    Being that you don't get the scripts, do you watch the show so you can follow everything else that is going on?
    Oh, I'm a huge fan of the show. Last year, I was in three episodes a year. I had a quick scene where I did a best man speech. So when I got that script, I didn't read any other part of the script because I didn't want to spoil it for myself, so I only read my little scene and learned my lines. I didn't even want to know who was getting married, because I'm so into the show. I think it's the best comedy on TV right now. It blows me away.

    So on Parks, Jean-Ralphio and Tom (Aziz Ansari) created the elaborate, although fruitless, media company Entertainment 720. Have you ever had any business ventures as creative as Jean-Ralphio's?
    I try to put my hand in as much as I can. At the beginning, when I was trying to get made, I had no money so I used to do everything I could. I used to freelance for anywhere—Letterman, [SNL's] "Weekend Update." I tried to sell a book, I tried to write a script for a TV show—I try to always keep myself busy. Like, "Oh, maybe I'll try to start a T-shirt company." Even if I have no fucking clue what I'm doing, I'll try to find someone else who knows what they're doing and try to work it out.

    The way I started, I just really wanted to do entertainment and I wanted to write and act so badly that I tried every single avenue at the beginning to try to hit it. I knew that if I failed at the beginning I wouldn't be able to do it. I didn't let myself be lazy for a second. And I failed at a bunch of them, but the more you put out there and the harder you work, you hopefully get a little bit lucky and one of them will hit.

    On your new show, House Of Lies, you showcase a more darkly comedic side of yourself.
    The show in general is darker. It follows four management consultants who are deeply flawed. The whole idea of the show is to go to the business and do whatever it takes to get that person's work. We literally have sex with people, screw people over—we don't care about anybody else in the world except for ourselves. All we are doing is protecting ourselves. I think that's a very specific type of human being that's able to do that, to not give a fuck about anybody in the world but themselves and truly not care.

    The most fun in the show is when the four of us are together and we're just fucking with each other. It's so funny and it's great. But when it's time to do work, we'll screw over anybody. We'll do anything that we can do to get the job. All we care about is getting that money and keeping our jobs, and then we go to the next place. We go from one job to another job to another job. We're on planes all the time, so you have to be someone who doesn't care about their personal life.

    How does playing a heavier role like that compare to playing a character like Jean-Ralphio?
    On House Of Lies I play an arrogant, smooth-talking guy. It's a character that would exist in real life. There are things that Jean-Ralphio does that nobody does. There is not a real human being that would ever do those things. And I love doing that because it's almost a caricature of one of the guys you've seen around. And [Clyde on] House Of Lies is a character that has flaws and real things happen. When he gets upset or nervous you can see it in his face, and when he goes through shit, and he thinks he's going to be in jeopardy, either in his personal life or his professional life, his whole attitude changes. He'll do anything to makes sure he is working and he'll fuck over anybody.

    Marty, Don Cheadle's character on the show, seems like the most cutthroat of the bunch. Is Clyde's approach as cutthroat as Marty's is, or are your more of the antithesis of him?
    There's so much stuff in my head when I do the character, the things that I want that aren't even written in the episode yet, but in my head I'm like, "Oh, my character is going to end up doing this." Because it's the first season, so we really learn about Marty and the reason why Marty is more cutthroat. He's like the Michael Jordan of the group. If we go places and a different management consultant sees us, they look at him and they're like, "Oh shit, that's Marty. He's the big guy. He's the number one guy." Even though we work for the number two firm, he's the dude. He's notorious. We all look up to him and we all kind of learn. But at the same time, him and Clyde are very good friends, but in the back of his head I'm sure he's like, "I'd fuck him over in a second." Because that's what these people are bred to think. That's what Cheadle's character thinks, so why wouldn't mine?

    Is there anything in that mentality that you that can relate to?
    I think it's more of a pathetic aspect [that I can relate to]. In this field, right now I'm doing Parks, House Of Lies, I'm writing some movies and another book, but in my head, the second House Of Lies wraps, I'll be totally nervous thinking, "I need to get my next job." I'm always scared it's just going to end. I've been so fortunate in the stuff that I've gotten. I'll always drive myself to think about the next thing and think, "Am I going to work again? When am I going to work again?" I think that's something that translates to this character. That every job—they need to get it. If they lose a job, there's a chance they lose their job at the company and they lose everything.

    Do you have that fear because your J.J. Abrams project Undercovers got canceled?
    It's been since the beginning. I know this is pathetic, but when I graduated college, my ex-girl at the time forced me to do long-form improv because I was too nervous to audition and too nervous to be rejected by the college troupe, and be told "You're not funny enough to be on this"—we're getting very real by the way—but, I luckily got on. I came home and I told my parents I really want to do comedy. I know there's not a lot of money in it, but I want to try it for a year and see if it sticks. And they were really supportive. In my head it just clicked that it was what I want to do.

    I just want it to keep going. I don't want it to stop. In my head, when Undercovers got canceled I was like, "Fuck, I gotta get another TV show," and I was fortunate that I was able to be picky this year. At Showtime, when we were auditioning, they pitched it to me that I can improvise, I can curse, and I can really explore stuff. And, I was like, you know what, I really like Showtime and HBO shows and I love the freedom that they have, but I really still want to do Parks And Rec. So it was something that I worked out that I can fit in Parks And Rec while I was doing that.

    There are going to be a slew of new shows hitting the scene in 2012. I mean, even Charlie Sheen has a sitcom lined up. What do you think House Of Lies greatest draw will be, in terms of the competition?
    I'm very particular about the things that I watch and I mostly only watch comedies because I like to learn. For me personally, the second I heard Don Cheadle was doing a television show, I would watch it because I think he's one of the best actors right now.

    It's a very slick and differently shot show. It's totally different than any Showime show. You get to see comedy mixed with real stuff happening, mixed with people really learning about themselves. I think when you watch a Showtime show, you get to really delve into that stuff a lot more and get to see the underbelly of business. If you watch a network show about the underbelly of business, it's going to be really different than a Showtime show. We get to show you the disgusting stuff that truly happens.

    I think it's really going to be fun. I think it's going to be a hit new...who knows. I thought Undercovers was going to be the biggest thing in the world. But I truly do love our pilot. If you give it a couple episodes, you learn so much in those four episodes. I feel like people will get hooked and keep coming back for more. You'll care about the comedic ideas and the story ideas as well. I really believe in it and I think it will be really fun.

    As a writer, are you always fighting the urge to add and improvise on the material given to you?
    Luckily, for Parks and House Of Lies, I'm encouraged to improvise. It's one of those things, at the beginning the four of us [on House Of Lies] will sit down with the script and play with it a little bit. The writers are awesome. But on Parks And Rec, it's just crazy. They'll do something on Parks And Rec called "fun run," which doesn't happen in a lot of places, where you get to just play around. Sometimes Jean-Ralphio's fun run stuff will end up in the episode and I won't even remember saying it and I'll see it on TV and be like, "That's amazing that they put that in there."

    I love the Jean-Ralphio highlight reel on your site, Rejected Jokes.
    It's crazy! NBC made that! I was like, "Oh god, I can't believe people care about this character enough." The funniest thing was one of the comments that someone said: "The Best of Jean-Ralphio is just every scene Jean-Ralphio is in."

    That's a compliment, right?
    Yeah, I think so, but also in my head, being down on myself, I was like, "Oh yeah. They just took all of my scenes and put them together."

    Well, if every scene was funny…
    I hope that's the case. I loved watching that. Also, the people on the Internet have been so cool, making GIFs of him and stuff.

    I hope they loved this season. My hair was huge this year! Since they'd started a company and were trying to be ballers, my one thing coming in was like, "I think he would blow out his hair and make it fucking enormous" match the amount of success of Entertainment 720.

    You've got quite a mop.
    It's pretty hilarious. I think that's the most talked about thing. It's bad when everyone's like, "Yeah, Jean-Ralphio's got weird hair, man," and I'm like, "OK, cool."

    Speaking of your website, you have to improve on your Wikipedia page. It's looking pretty vacant considering how much you've done lately. What's up with that? Do I need to go in there and make some additions?
    [Laughs.] I didn't make it! Every now and then I'll check up on it. I'll be like, "Where did they get that picture from?" It's a little all over the place. I kind of love that it keeps changing with false information. Maybe this interview will help fill in all the right information.

    One of the few things that it does say is that you got started faxing your jokes to Saturday Night Live. Is that true?
    I started by doing UCB, and then I was a page for David Letterman, which means you show people to their seats, show them where their bathroom is, and give them tickets. And I worked that into being a freelance writer for the monologue, which means I would fax in jokes. So I'd fax in 15 jokes every day to Letterman. Then Horatio Sanz over at SNL helped me out, because he was a UCB guy and he said, "Hey, you should do it for SNL." So I did it for SNL, so again I'd wake up really in the morning and fax in jokes. I didn't put it on my resumé until I got a cerain amount of jokes on.

    What was the magic number?
    On Letterman it was three. I ended up getting 15 or more, but I only got like two jokes on SNL. It was in the same show. It was when Horatio had subbed in for Tina Fey on "Weekend Update." I thought he was so funny in it. And he used two of my jokes, and the jokes were so racy I could not believe he used them. They were so fucked up, and it got great reactions. I was so proud of myself that day.

    I remember the first time Letterman said one of my jokes. I was a page so I was inside watching the show, and my heart was beating out of my chest. I was like, "Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god." It was a really fun moment. It was that dream like, "Maybe there's a chance I won't be showing people to the bathroom when he says it."

    I think writing is terrifying in some aspects because you're saying, "This is what I think is funny, this is what I'm capable of. Tell me what you think." People can judge your words. Writing is a fucking scary thing.

    I was wondering if you had a favorite joke that got shot down?
    My website Rejected Jokes, the way that it started is that I would take all of those jokes that were rejected from both of those show and I would perform them in front of an audience of zero and they would bomb. I've almost hidden all of these from the site because I'm really embarassed, because, you know, I didn't know how to perform in front of a camera. But guests would come—Seth Green, Rob Whaley, Seth Riggle—and the website got a little bit popular.

    How often do you get rejected now?
    Oh, constantly. If you think about auditioning, you have to have such thick skin. You know you're going to fail in this business. You can do your best job and come in and audition for something and really kill it and knock it out of the park and then they just look at me and be like, "Yeah, but you're not right for the role"

    Do they give you specific feedback on why you're "not right"?
    Sometimes they'll want like a super hot dude or someone who's not Jewish.
    Or again, there are some times I go in and I'm not good or they don't think I'm funny. But the whole idea in improv is not being afraid to fail and saying yes to everything. But with writing, when you really put your heart into something and hand it to somebody, like a script: When you sell it, it's amazing and when it doesn't go, it sucks.

    Just as an aside, is Kristin Bell as hot in person?
    She's fucking gorgeous. She's 5'1 and she's so funny, so sweet and so nice. She's just a beautiful little woman.

    Rob Lowe in New York
    He looks like an 80-year-old Jared Leto.

    Interviewing Darren Criss with Kelly Ripa

    Rob Lowe as Drew Peterson


    Misc. Pictures

    He looks smart.

    Bonus: Will Arnett on Letterman


    Watch House of Lies and other Showtime shows for free this weekend. No one paid me to say that.
    College Humor Best of Ben Schwartz Playlist
    Happy New Year from the cast [Video]

    Source - 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14

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    Keri Russell and husband Shane Deary are the proud parents of a baby girl!

    The 35-year-old actress gave birth to daughter Willa Lou on December 27, her rep confirms to

    This is the second child for Keri and Shane, who tied the knot on Valentine’s Day 2007. The two also have a 4-year-old son, River.

    Keri can next be seen in the comedy Goats, opposite David Duchovny, Ty Burrell, and Vera Farmiga, and also the romantic comedy Austenland.


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    jesus chain


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  • 01/05/12--16:51: shaking and fucking crying


    Mutya and Keisha both tweeted the news!Bbasically confirming they're back together and in the studio with Professor Green right now!

    Keisha's tweet
    Mutya's tweet

    mods-ik its a twitter post, but c'mon, THIS IS THE BEST NEWS EVER!!!!

    I am crying right now, Siobhan+Keisha+Mutya=BRILLIANCE.

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    The new season of Donald Trump's "Celebrity Apprentice" hasn't even started up and comic Lisa Lampanelli is already firing the first salvo at NBC.

    Lampanelli blasted the network to for disrespecting her by inviting her and fellow contestants, former Miss Universe Dayana Mendoza and "The Real Housewives of New Jersey" star Teresa Giudice, to a Knicks game at Madison Square Garden — and then putting her in the back while the others got courtside seats.

    "We killed ourselves literally all day promoting for the show," Lampanelli told TMZ. "Well, guess what NBC, you owe me a big f— apology."

    "Take a picture of my apartment building and get my address, because I'll expect my gift basket and good Knicks tickets tomorrow."

    The standup comedian famous for her insults will have plenty of fodder in a cast that includes Arsenio HallTia Carrere, “American Idol” singer Clay Aiken and mob daughter Victoria Gotti. The new season starts Feb. 12 at 9 p.m.

    "You think anyone is watching that 'Celebrity Apprentice' for anybody except me and a couple other people who really keep the ball rolling," Lampanelli asked TMZ.


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  • 01/05/12--17:05: :(

  • Sarah Harding On Fight With Ex: "He Got Me By The Throat"

    Sarah Harding has broken her silence regarding the New Year's Eve fight she had with her Dutch lover, insisting it was him who attacked her.

    Earlier this week, Theo De Vries gave his version of events to The Sun, telling the tabloid that the Girls Aloud star bit his leg, threw an ashtray at him and struck him in the face, leaving him with a bloody nose.

    With both Theo and Sarah now apparently facing trial for assault, the black and blue 30-year old has responded to De Vries comments, recalling what happened that night at their four-star hotel in Innsbruck, Austria.

    The pair, who met in rehab, were supposed to be having a 'healthy' skiing holiday when the incident occurred - with an emotional Sarah revealing to The Sun: "I have a black eye and bruising. He had me by the neck, on the floor, and I kicked him to get him off me.

    "He grabbed me by my hair throwing my head on the floor. We were struggling. While he had me by the hair, he was pulling me across the floor. He was dragging me around. He was smacking my head on the floor. He bit my ear. And when I kicked him to try and get him off me, I got his nose and he was bleeding. He smeared the blood all over my face so it was all over my clothes."

    Covered in bruises, Sarah exclaimed: "Look at me, look what he has done to me. That doesn't come from just holding me back. I've got bruises on my bum. Bruises on my legs. The damage to my arm is probably the worst. This is where they bandaged me in hospital as they thought I might have fractured it."

    Despite her desire to have a relaxing NY break, Harding told the newspaper that things soon turned nasty between herself and Theo - who has previously received treatment for booze and crack cocaine addiction.

    Speaking of their argument, Sarah said: "During the row he said, 'You're nothing but a B-class singer. You are just a f****** alcoholic. You have got no friends.'

    "He was really, really horrible. Any insecurities I had, he used them against me. He was goading me. The abuse carried on and on and on till I'd had enough. He got so horrible I threw a coffee cup at him. It missed.

    "It was probably coming up to midnight. I'm not going to lie, I had a gin and tonic at the airport, but I was sober at this point. I wasn't drunk at all. He didn't seem drunk but he just completely changed character."

    When asked about her budding romance with the 35-year old sunglasses salesman, Harding admitted that she was 'on the rebound' after splitting from her boyfriend, DJ Tom Crane in September 2011.

    Sarah explained: "We met in rehab and I was at a real low in my life. We got on really well and he was a completely different person when we were in rehab. We just decided to give it a go.

    "When we came back to London, things just didn't seem to be the same. It didn't work. I think he knew I missed Tom, because I do desperately.

    "I think in a way I was on a rebound. I think that p***** him off. I called him Tom a few times by mistake. He hated that. Probably when we were rowing probably because I used to shout at Tom.

    "Now I think he's full of s***. Reading what he said in The Sun, I thought, 'Oh my God'. I never threw an ashtray at him. I threw a mug at him, because he was goading me. He was being so foul to me."

    Full Article @ Source (its a long read but wow, I am shocked)

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    Elin Nordegren, Tiger Woods' ex-wife, bulldozed her brand new $12 million Florida mansion. The seven bedroom, eight bathroom estate is located on Billionaire's Row in North Palm Beach, about 80 miles north of Miami.

    TMZ reports that Nordegren plans on building her dream home. It is not known when construction will begin. The estate is 11 miles south of Woods' home on Jupiter Island. Perhaps Elin moved nearby so her children can be near their father?

    The model also owns a $2.3 million estate on an island near Stockholm in her native Sweden. The Swedish beauty reportedly received $110 million as part of her divorce settlement.


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    PASADENA - Betty White thinks it's time for senior citizens to get even.

    And who's going to say no to Betty White, America's favorite senior citizen, who turns 90 on Jan. 17?

    Starting on Jan. 16, she will be hosting NBC's new "Betty White's Off Your Rockers," which might be subtitled "Revenge of the Octos."

    It's a "Candid Camera"-style show that White says simply reverses the long-standing tradition of young folks playing practical jokes on gullible old folks.

    "This show is seniors pranking the younger people," White told TV critics here Friday. "It says we've got a sense of humor, too - warped as it may be."

    "Off Their Rockers" features random bizarre situations, such as a senior citizen bowling with a cantaloupe in the flower shop or playing pool with items in a supermarket display.

    In one scene, a senior balloon vendor hands a bunch of helium balloons to a younger woman and they lift her off the ground.

    A lot of the gags are verbal, with seniors making blunt remarks, sexual and otherwise, that the recipient clearly did not expect from a sweet old person.

    White, who says she grew up as a fan of "Candid Camera," will contribute short sketches to "Off Their Rockers," but not be involved in the pranks.

    "I leave it to the production team," she said. "I'm too busy with the other stuff."

    That includes her hit sitcom "Hot in Cleveland" as well as a continuing stream of guest appearances.

    NBC will precede the premiere "Off Their Rockers" with a 90th birthday tribute, which will be taped Sunday with long-time White colleagues like Valerie Harper and Ed Asner.

    It will naturally be 90 minutes long.

    Asked how TV is different today than when she started her career in the 1950s, White said the main difference is the audience.

    "Today they've heard all the jokes, they know all the plots," she said. "They're a much tougher audience.

    "I'd say they're more sophisticated, except then I show you a show like this."

    White said, as she has said before, that she considers herself "the luckiest broad on two feet" to have good health and continuing popularity.

    She also said she will keep taking offers as long as they come in.

    "They won't last forever," she said. "Who knows whether they'll still want me when I'm 100?"


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    Even though the promo stills give away basically the whole episode, photoshoot!Birkhoff demands that you watch the trailer for the next episode of Nikita, a show that remains without flaws.


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    FC Barcelona Visited 7 Hospitals Handing Out Gifts To Children

    Gerard Pique along with his teammates and members of the board of directors, visited seven Barcelona hospitals, where they passed out 4,000 presents to sick children for "El Dia De Los Reyes Magos"

    President Sandro Rosell led the Azulgrana expedition to Hospital Barcelona, where he was accompanied by the director, Javier Bordas and the players, Javier Mascherano and Maxwell. All of whom talked to Barça TV during their trip

    The FC Barcelona manager, Josep Guardiola, visited Hospital Nens de Barcelona, with Alves, Adriano, Fotas, Cuenca and Muniesa, and the director Pilar Guinovart.

    The rest of the Barça footballers went to Hospital Sant Pau, Hospital del Mar, Sant Joan de Déu, Hospital de Vall d’Hebron and Trias i Pujol. Before making their way to Trias i Pujol, Xavi, Serio Roberto, and the directors Dídac Lee and Manel Arroyo, passed out presents at the Guttmann Institute.

    Gerard and KEITEEEEEEE

    GQ Coach and my boyfriend Andreu

    This is PERFECT

    The King Chinchonero Dani

    The Messiah and #PINTOTRATION representing WMmakinaciones

    This UNF GQ Man Best Goalie out there RN

    The BABIES!

    This post is just too cute! Nice to see the guys make so many kids happy.

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