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Poet Staceyann Chin: why chasing straight women still thrills me

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They take ages to seduce, they're rubbish in bed – and then they go back to their boyfriends. But Staceyann Chin still can't resist turning a straight woman's head
(Cribbed)
There may be a thousand reasons why lesbians love the thrill of a straight girl. Maybe women who chase women possess the same rabid ego we despise in straight men, the same ego that makes a person go giddy at the thought of being "the first" for the straight girl in question. The heterosexual terrain of her flesh, untouched by other dyke hands, smacks of the virgin narrative. Who wouldn't want to be "the first"? Who doesn't like what feels like a conquest? A win?
Maybe it is the thrill of conversion.Who is to say such conquests were not sleeper-lesbians, just waiting for the right moment to awaken? I suppose, though, through the right lens, the process could be described as evangelical, this business of meeting, and courting and having a woman decide to jump the heterosexual ship to be with you.You are the chosen one, the messiah, the mandate that pulls her, magnetic, toward her most hidden desires.
Never, ever overtly refer to the electricity crackling between the two of you. Courting the bi-curious requires the skill of restraint. There is a sort of informal manual for lesbian chasing not-so-straight. And the first rule is, you have to be platonic first. Girls who are not-so-straight but identify as straight – even when they admit to being attracted to women – don't want that interest to seem conscious. It's always better if it seems like an impulsive adventure, a thing that just happened. Which means you always begin as nothing more than a friend. No compliments, no kissing, no holding hands, no longing looks. No I miss you phone calls. No yearning. Just casual chitchat girly-girl conversations. You should laugh when she confides in having a crush on some boy. Offer advice on what she should wear when she goes to see him. Be supportive of her relationship. Become her friend, first. Work very hard at being her very best friend. Always remember, you're only her friend. You are not allowed to bend that rule for at least three months.
Much more at the source:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2012/apr/20/staceyann-chin-straight-women-thrill-me

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